There were debates floating around on EGL about if you have to be actively wearing lolita fashion to be considered a Lolita (with a capitol "L") at all. There is one side that decided that you did have to be wearing the fashion to be a part of the lifestyle. There is another side that thought that you don't have to be wearing the fashion actively, but you have to be working your way up to wearing the fashion to be considered a Lolita.
I have considered myself part of the lolita lifestyle for a year now and I don't wear the fashion yet. Part of it is because I don't have the spare money to buy anything new right now. Part of it is that I just didn't have the right amount of confidence to wear it earlier because I discovered it when I was still in college and my confidence in my body image was still developing.
If you take a look at my other activities and my other interests, it wouldn't be a big surprise that I am into this fashion. I enjoy knitting, spinning, tatting, embroidery, sewing, quilting, crocheting, tea, reading, classical music, cats, and many more that makes up the span of the "lolita lifestyle". But if you take a look at what I wear and the make up of my living space, you wouldn't have any idea that I was into cute and frilly at all.
I think that if you are in the lolita closet, then you should come out for yourself. Just recently I picked up an old copy of the Gothic & Lolita Bible and showed it to my mother. She thought it was funny that I was drawn to such a girly fashion, but was glad that I was getting in touch with my feminine side at last. I needed to share this with my mom to consider myself "out of the wardrobe" so to speak, but others may not need to take a direct approach. If anything, start to match your decor to what you are interested in. Or maybe make yourself a giant head eating bow.
For all of you lolitas still hiding in the closet, please come out and accept that there is nothing weird about liking this fashion. Be proud of you interests. You will feel a lot better once you do.
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